Sunday, December 13, 2009

Sexual Health Sundays: In Defense of Procrasturbation

During exam season, there are a variety of ways to procrastinate:

1. Stress eating. This involves going to the kitchen, opening every cupboard/door, gazing at the contents with visible discontent, and then stuffing something in your mouth that will inevitably end up being unsatisfying (ie. a handful of dry cheerios, stale bread, advent-calendar chocolate that tastes like plastic, a $5 wheel of brie cheese, meat-flavoured chips). The problem with this approach is that food never quite seems to fill that gaping hole inside of your heart.

2. Spending 100 hours on Wikipedia, following link after link until you know too much about the Tokyo Legendarium and/or Middle Earth and then spewing unnecessary facts to your friends until they no longer want to have anything to do with you.

3. Facebook-stalking, looking at the people you wish you could have hooked up with but never did and seeing how they are getting on with their lives (or not). This will either make you feel triumphant or hopeless.

Since none of these options are particularly helpful, I suggest an alternative: procrasturbating.

I, personally, am an avid procrasturbator. It’s a great way to take a small break during a marathon study session or paper-writing bonanza.... plus, it has numerous advantages. Procrasturbation helps reduce stress (thanks, oxytocin), is completely healthy, and may even help get rid of your inevitable coffee/no-sleep headache.

But is procrasturbation feminist?

Of course. By becoming attuned to my own desire and sexual response, I’m laying claim to my body and my fundamental right to pleasure. That sounds pretty feminist to me.

Happy studying!


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